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Panics

One night at a theatre some scenery took fire, and a very perceptible odor of burning alarmed the spectators. A panic seemed to be imminent, when an actor appeared on the stage. "Ladies and gentlemen," he said, "compose yourselves. There is no danger."

The audience did not seem reassured. "Ladies and gentlemen," continued the comedian, rising to the necessity of the occasion, "confound it all-do you think if there was any danger I'd be here?"

The panic collapsed.