Toaster's Handbook: Jokes, Stories and Quotations

“Nothing so frightens a man as the announcement that he is expected to respond to a toast.” Five hundred pages of jokes, stories and quotations filed A to Z, so the terrified speaker can find one fast.

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Beetles

Now doth the frisky June Bug Bring forth his aeroplane, And try to make a record, And busticate his brain!

He bings against the mirror, He bangs against the door, He caroms on the ceiling, And turtles on the floor!

He soars aloft, erratic, He lands upon my neck, And makes me creep and shiver, A neurasthenic wreck! -Charles Irvin Junkin.

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