Snow-Balls
Every boy has played at snow-balls, from the time that his little fingers were first able to grasp and mould a handful of snow. Elderly gentlemen know to their cost how apt the youthful friend is to hur very hard snow-balls, which appear to pick out the tenderest parts of his person, generally contriving to lodge just at the juncture of the chin and the comforter, or coming with a deafening squash in the very centre of his ear. Even the dread policeman does not always escape; and when he turns round, indignant at the temporary loss of his shiny hat, he cannot recognise his assailant in the boy who is calmly whistling the last new nigger-song, as he saunters along, with both his hands in his pockets. The prudent schoolmaster will also not venture too near the playground, unless he has provided himself with an umbrella. It is rather a remarkable fact, that whenever a Grammar-school and a National-school are within a reasonable distance of each other, they are always at deadly feud. So it was at the school where our youthful days were passed. One winter's morning, just after school had opened, the door was flung violently open, and a party of National-school boys hurled a volley of snow-balls at the head-master. He, after the door had been secured, remarked in a particularly mild voice,--"Now, boys, if I had been at school, and my schoolmaster had been assaulted by National-school boys, I should have gone out and given them a thrashing. Remember, I do not at all advise you to do so, but merely mention the course that I should have adopted under such circumstances. We will resume lessons at three." So saying, he took off his gown, put on his hat and gloves, and walked out to see the fun. Now, the prospect of a morning's holiday would have made us attack a force of twenty times our number, but as they only out-numbered us threefold, we commenced a pursuit without hesitation. After a sharp engagement, we drove them back to their own schoolroom. The cause of their yielding was, that they threw at random among us, whereas each of our balls was aimed at the face of an opponent, and we very seldom missed. When they had reached their school, they closed and barred their door; at which we made such a battering, that their master, a large negro, rushed out upon us, vowing vengeance, and flourishing a great cane. He was allowed to proceed a few yards from the door, when one snow-ball took off his hat, and two more lodged in his face. He immediately went to the right-about, and made for the school, which he reached under an avalanche of snow. We pursued, but he had succeeded in fastening the door, and we could not open it for some time. When we did, the school was deserted; not a boy was to be seen. There was no back entrance to account for their disappearance, and we were completely puzzled. At last, when we had quieted down a little, a murmuring was heard apparently below our feet, and on examination we found that the entire school had taken shelter in the coal-cellar. We made a dash at the door (a trap-door), and in spite of the showers of coal that came from below, fastened and padlocked the door, carefully throwing the key among a clump of firtrees, where it was not likely to be found. Having achieved this victory, we had a snow-ball match among ourselves, and then returned to school. About five o'clock, in rushed the black schoolmaster, who had only just been liberated by the blacksmith, and who came to complain of our conduct. So far, however, from obtaining any satisfaction, he was forced to apologise for the conduct of his boys.